>Stark Raving Madras

>Since I’ve moved to Center City and have been walking only a few blocks to work in the morning, I have noticed a rather disturbing trend.


I’ve seen this whole madras thing before in windows like J. Crew and other ultra preppy stores, but lately it seems like it has exploded into this unstoppable wave of douchebaggery. I see babies in little madras dresses. I see women wearing these madras skirts to work with flip-flops (don’t even get me started on that). Over the past few days it’s become a joke between Jon and I, because we talk on the phone on my very brief walk to work– maybe 4 blocks total?– I will encounter at least two or up to five instances of madras. I saw a woman in a madras skirt this morning before I even got off of my front step! It inspired me to coin a new snowclone, “Madras is the new popped collar.” Ugly, douchey, and inexplicably popular.

I was going on and on about it (as is my nature) to my coworker Tracey when we popped out to grab lunch, and I was somewhat surprised that on the busy lunchtime Center City streets I couldn’t find one example. Our conversation was suddenly dampened by a really godawful cover band, the members of which just had to be someone’s kid. Had to. No way they got an obviously paying gig on the street for some outdoor corporate event otherwise. Tracey mockingly danced to their oppressively bad rendition of “All Along the Watchtower” as we walked by.

Passing again on the way back, I snarked that I bet every one of these dudes in this terrible band own a pair of madras shorts. Then, as if I had conjured it by sheer, unintentional will, the sea of passersby parted and I got a good look at the singer who was, you guessed it, wearing madras shorts! I squealed with delighted horror (I wonder if the Germans have a word for that), scaring a good handful of people on the street. I tried to get a shot with my cell phone but apparently my camera is made of chicken grease because this is the best I could get:


…but that’s probably for the best. Don’t want to look too intently into the madras, you could go blind.

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